Why vote?

Everywhere you look, you hear about the presidential elections. You hear every tiny bit of gossip about each candidate, you see their ads on TV and you get friends sending you links to support-sites online.
I feel that in today’s world, voting for a candidate is probably an easier choice than any era before. If you want to find out about political views, just search for the politician and you get a summary of every different issue you’re concerned about.
Some would agree though that with the availability of information, we also have a harder choice. After learning of scandals and personal-life issues, do we take those into account when deciding who to vote for?
I try to look past most of the smaller issues that are somehow brought up and focus on the issues at hand. Things like immigration, energy conservation, economic ideals and human rights. One of the main problems I’m having though is finding a candidate that shares every belief that I have. Someone who will run the country the way I would if I were in their position.
I thought I found a relatable enough candidate; then they picked their running mate. Coming into all of this in a more deliberate approach than previous elections, mainly because I’m able to vote this year, I didn’t guess that running mates would be such a big ordeal until one of them was so surprisingly thrown into the spotlight. The running mate of the candidate opposite of the one I was planning on voting for is all over the media lately, so I decided to read up on the running mate of the candidate I wanted to vote for, someone who I haven’t heard much about.
I was looking at their political views and noticed that some of their views don’t necessarily correspond with mine nor the main candidate’s. They seem alike to the point that they can be considered on the same party, but some of the small discrepancies could make or break my vote if they were the main candidate, which led me to thinking. If I decide I don’t like a politician, or any of the politicians running…what do I do? Do I not vote? That would seem logical. So many people say I should vote though. Everyone’s heard “There are starving kids in Ethiopia, you should eat all your peas.” There are people who can’t vote, so should I vote? If I was forced morally to vote, like I felt forced by morals to eat those darned peas, would I vote for the lesser of two evils? I still can’t help feeling that I’m voting for something I don’t agree upon.
Take for instance, a ballot that says:
“Do you support your painful demise?”
What if the only option on the ballot said “Yes?” Would you still place your vote? Some people could argue that not everyone would get a chance to make the choice to vote, so you should take advantage of it.
I’m not planning on voting for life-or-death issues, at least not to my knowledge; but the issues I’m focusing on, I feel, do affect me. I care about them and want them to sway in my favor. Am I so wrong to think that if you’re not going to give me the options I want, I don’t want to make a decision yet?

Tangled web we weave

So I just got done hanging out with some people at a restuarant. This group of friends always goes to this specific location. They all know each other there and there’s a large enough group that even if you don’t plan on seeing anyone there, chances are you will.

The problem I have with getting to deeply invovled with this group is how very interlaced their relationships are with each other. It seems almost as if everyone has gone out with everyone else and has something to say about their past relationships. The boys are attractive for the most part, and seem to be all right people. They tend to seem a bit on the easy side, which isn’t attractive to me. I’m also not sure I could handle the conversation the way I’m sure it would go. Here’s my prediction:

“Hi! Guess what! I’m going out with Joe!”
“Oh. I went out with him last summer. Good luck!”
(I should not continue but…)”What do you mean?”
“Well…I dunno. He’s just <negative aspect of other person>.”

You get the idea, right? I’m almost certain that if this did happen, the negative comment would most certainly be lingering in the hidden depths of my mind for all the right times to pop out and force me to reconsider the relationship.

I live in a smaller area. There’s a cluster of cities and we like to think that when combined, we’re somewhat impressive. The big problem is, it’s still small. The cluster consists of something like 150,000-200,000 people maybe, but the gay community isn’t very large especially when you consider the age group to be 17-22 or so? I would say there’s atleast 30 gays in the area that fit in that age range. 25 of them go to this restaurant. I’ve been with the three others. I know 2 of the other people and they’re slutty without the 25 people. I’m doomed, right? =P

(Note: Figures in the article are mostly imaginative.)

A Balancing Act

I finished watching a flash movie about 8 principals to having fun. One of the principals stated that you should remove all the clutter in your life. I agree with that, but in the list of clutter it said people. I felt they said this hesitantly, don’t ask me why I think that. Either in that same movie or in another one made by them, they said that you should love and cherish your friends and family. This created a problem for me, if I were to follow those principals.

A lot of the clutter I see in my life comes from my family and sometimes my friends. I love them but they do have their tenancies to get overwhelming. I always saw my self doing something great with my life, but I also want to be with the people I love and experience life with them. There are some problems in that equation. I feel as though nothing truly great resides where I live currently. I live in a small area full of people and companies, most of which aren’t huge in the world. I would like to think that if I did something, it’d be to better the world but I don’t know if I can do that here. Basically, I want to move, see the world and draw in experiences from different places and people. Honestly, I don’t want to leave my friends…I want to leave my family, which I think is normal for someone of my age.

I feel as though one of my friends might be holding me back. I love her dearly, so I say this with the best intentions. I always thought I would be doing things in a spontaneous way. On a whim. She however plans everything, which works for her. She doesn’t want to move anywhere unless she already has a job waiting, an apartment waiting and knows what’s going on. I however don’t understand how you can have a life somewhere you’ve never been. There has to be some planning for the future, like I would either take enough money with me to get a place to stay or have someone waiting to help me out with rooming accommodations. So I was thinking about this lately, and I discuss it with her and she seems to think I’m crazy. She explicitly told me that I cannot go anywhere that I don’t have a place to live and a job to earn money from. I told her what I thought on all this, and as my best friend she barred me from going anywhere without mainly these two qualifications.

Would my friend qualify as clutter? She said she would follow me, if I moved appropriately. Would this be a good situation? Lots of questions are running through my head.

Missing the delicate aroma

Hey guys,

I know I haven’t posted in a while. I haven’t really had anything to talk about…Okay, well I have but I didn’t think it was interesting enough to post.

It’s said that smell is the sense that creates the best memories.
I came home just now from hanging out with a friend and I’m so…bummed. I don’t know if it’s to the extent of being depressed, but definitely down. A boyfriend I was going out with this winter wore this spray called “Masculino” I believe and I loved it! Whenever I was around him, the smell was so pleasant it just put me in a 7th heaven mood.
We’ve been apart for months now, but even when I smell it I think of him. I think of all those moments we’ve shared together. I miss him and I missed that smell.
I was in the store a week ago and I sprayed some on myself. I know, creepy right? Well I couldn’t help myself. All the way home I kept smelling my wrist; where I sprayed it for easy access. A few days after my reminiscence I asked a friend if it would be inappropriate for me to purchase that spray. They said it would be fine. This friend knows that my ex wore it. She likes the smell too. She said it’s not weird that I’m wearing what he used to wear.

Tonight I wore that spray. Every time I smell it, I miss him! I can’t stop thinking about him; cuddling him, holding him, being next to him, talking to him. All of it.

Is this a good idea? Should I continue to wear something that might possibly torture me the entire time? Or will this scent association dissipate?

Children with Children

Something that I find to be a large issue in my generation is young parents. It seemed that from junior year in high school to now, there has been a large amount of people who had children. These people range from 16 years old to about 25. I believe that if you’re under 25 years old, you are in no way mature enough to raise a child unless absolutely necessary and even then, your parents should help you.

The cause, in my experience with this is neglect of proper protection. Most of the young parents I ask say their kids are accidents. Neither of the parents has good jobs, stable lives or is emotionally prepared for a child.¹ The reason of neglect gives me the ability to, for the most part, not feel any guilt or sorrow for those young parents.

 

My sister is included in the ever increasing list of young parents. She is already on her second “accident child”. I remember a few of our conversations when she was pregnant with her first child. I asked her why she hadn’t used a condom. Her response was that it was too much of a hassle and they didn’t like the feeling of them. Then later in the conversation she asked me if I felt sorry for her being in that situation. I told her the truth, which is I did not feel at all sorry for her. She didn’t understand why. She was put in the awkward position of having to explain to her mother that she was knocked up without being married. I told her that this was the price she would have to pay for not thinking ahead and using the necessary protection to prevent it.

She’s now on her second child. The care she provides for her child is sufficient but no where near what I had hoped it would be. I’m thoroughly disappointed. Sure, she goes to work now (after having taken five months off). My mother babysits while my sister is at work. When my sister comes home, she calls her husband and they talk for a while then my sister goes to sleep. The entire time she’s home, our mother is watching my sister’s child.

I’m not trying to say she neglects him, but she doesn’t do her part by any means. I feel that she figures that because she’s worked 8 hours today, she doesn’t have to do anything after getting out of work. Normally this might be true, but because she has the responsibility of raising a human being for the next 18 years, she isn’t finished when she gets home.

One evening, she was busy talking to her husband on the phone in the kitchen. Her son followed her out there and proceeded on standing on a kitchen chair. Everyone else was sitting in the living room at the time, assuming she was paying full attention to the child. She didn’t take him off the chair. He eventually slipped a bit and almost fell off. He didn’t get hurt but he was certainly scared which caused him to cry. I was upset that she wasn’t fully aware of the situation her son was in.

 

I suppose this mother stuff will eventually sink in. Hopefully having two kids will speed up the process. The main thing I’m scared of though is the fact there’s a slim chance the children might be suffering. The child might suffer in the sense of emotional instability. The young parents of today may not have the experience in handling certain situations that may come up.

 

A few months ago a friend of mine was talking to me online. We were discussing her relationship with a new boy. She was 18 or 19 at the time. This was the year after she was supposed to have graduated. He was a sophomore. They had been going out for less than 6 months. They had made plans to get married and have a child. I stated that I was against this decision and as her friend I strongly suggested she didn’t follow through with this idea. When I stated this, she got upset with me and basically disconnected with me for quite some time. I don’t know what her opinion is any longer. We just recently started talking again, and the subject hasn’t come up and I dare not trigger it. Either way, it’s thoroughly disappointing to see that my generation has lost the ability to think through their actions before following through with them.

 

In ending, I’d like to state that I love my sister and my nephew very much. I think my nephew has brightened up my life immensely. In my opinion, my sister is doing a fine job raising him, but like any other parents, she has her weak spots.

 

 

¹The grammar of this sentence has been edited by Microsoft Word. If it sounds awkward, it isn’t my fault.

Secret Messages

A couple times in my life I have had friends betray me so much that it is difficult for me to continue the friendship. One such instance is when a girl set me up with the immature boy that was a few years too young for me. She had knowingly allowed me to go out with someone who was illegally too young for me. My other friends agreed that this was a high offense and that it would be appropriate if I didn’t talk to her any more. So, calmly we all just stopped talking to her and I haven’t heard from her. I’m not quite sure why she’s been so okay with it, she sees us all hanging out together. Anyways, I was able to just move on without her just fine.

 

Another such instance was when a friend set me up with someone. Everything was going fine until one day, I was hanging out with her, another girl and we went to pick up the boy. We arrived at his house and I wanted him to sit up front with me and my friend got upset and insisted that he sit in back. I asked her why and she got offended. She said she needed to inform him of something. So, they talked then I asked if he could sit upfront and she agreed. There was a bit of hostility between us though. Later, after we dropped him off, I explained I was hoping to hold his hand for the first time that evening, and then I think she felt guilty. Anyways, I asked her later what the whole thing was about. She held it as a secret for a while, then informed me that she had told him that he had to contact another boy they mutually knew. This boy they mutually knew had to warn the boy I was interested in about something about me. I asked her what, and she said she didn’t know.

After that, it seemed to that there was a lot of drama between the three of us, all caused from the “secret”. Eventually the guy broke up with me because he was interested in someone else (who never went out with him anyways). The funny thing is I eventually met the person that had this secret message. He said that here wasn’t anything he was supposed to warn my ex about. He didn’t even know me, especially when the situation occurred. He just wanted to get in contact with my ex.

So now that you’re updated on the situation, my problems will be easier to understand. The girl that messed up the relationship between the guy and me because she lied about stuff and started a bunch of drama still thinks we’re friends. She calls me quite often and even annoys me with the whole “We need to hang out.” “Why don’t you call me?” and “I miss you!” comments.

I find it very difficult to hang out with people I lost trust in. I find it especially difficult to hang out with people who would appear crazy in the sense that they push drama into a relationship using lies. To be honest though, when I ignore her voice messages, text messages and calls, I feel a sliver of guilt. Is it all that bad that I don’t condone hanging out with liars, drama llamas and crazy people? Should I continue to hang out with her? I did have some fun with her, but the drama was overwhelming. Which out weighs the other?

Gift Giving

Tomorrow is my friend’s birthday. She and I have been friends longer than anyone else. For the most part, during her birthday’s she’s content with just getting a “Happy Birthday” from me. This year, until recently, I hadn’t thought too much about it. This year her birthday happens to land on Easter. She asked me a few weeks ago to take her out to her family’s farm about a half hour away. I agreed, because I have the weekend off, I love hanging out with her and her family is interesting. Typically, I don’t feel pressured into giving her stuff. This year is different though. I feel because her entire family is going to be there, I should do something for her.

 

I’m a horrible gift giver. When I have to pick out a gift, knowledge of the receiver just completely fades away. I loose thoughts of what they like and what they’ve mentioned in the past. Typically I end up giving them a gift card and usually they’re content with that. Going to her birthday/Easter celebration with her entire family present with no more than a gift card may not look appropriate.

 

A few weeks ago, we were watching Pride and Prejudice and I mentioned how I was somewhat interested in reading the book. She said she also thought of reading it, so I was thinking just now of giving her the book for her birthday.

 

We come to the point in which makes me believe that gift-giving is the worst tradition I can think of (at the moment). For the most part, the gift-giving process would seem to be a terrific way of showing someone appreciation. In my past experience, and this mostly comes from experience from of gift-giving between family members, someone is almost always displeased. Two outcomes are possible. One, the person giving it can be displeased with the item, the trouble of retrieving the item, etc. Two is that the person receiving it may not enjoy the gift and has to put a face on for someone. Either way, someone is usually unhappy. In the case that both parties are appreciative of the situation, then it’s a glorious moment!

 

In the end, I’d rather just skip the whole process and spend the entire day with the person doing what they enjoy. I know I sound sort of like a jerk. I suppose we can all hope that experience helps this problem.

 

(P.S. This was written on Saturday, but I’m going to take the weekends off, when writing. I’ll maybe write posts and just hold them until the weekday.)